


Eternal Regret

by jadencross



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: And descriptions of rotting so, Gen, I accodentally inspired myself, Kinda, Probs really short, Theres a lot od bodies at the beginning, Two at the most, Woops, i dunno how long this will be, im so sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-07-14
Packaged: 2018-04-09 06:27:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4337435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadencross/pseuds/jadencross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Matthias came into this world knowing two things: </p><p>1) his name was Matthias</p><p>2) the man he loves is in danger</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I was playing around with Dennor angst and then everything got intense

My name is Matthias. I am 20. I have no mother, no father, no sister, and no brother. I don't have an aunt or uncle either. Not that I ever met.

I live a simple life. Every day I go out and work at the bakery for food and every night I come home to the only room I've ever had.

Most would call it "dank" or "horrifying," but I only think of it as home. Sure it has no windows, there are chains on the wall that used to hold rotting bodies, and skeletons everywhere, but I like it. I like it even more now that it doesn't smell. 

It does get cold, though. But that's to be expected of a stone dungeon underneath a church that no one knows about except yourself and the preacher who took care of you as a child. Typically I would remedy this by taking the clothes off the skeletons and bundling up.

My favorite place to sleep is next to the most recent body. The person was dead before I was born, but they were the only one that still had anything but bones for a long time. Sometimes I would snuggle next to it and pretend that they, whoever they used to be, were my family. In some ways, they are.

Their bleached bones are now my only friend.

But there is something else about me that's odd. You're probably thinking "you live alone with bodies. How weird could it be?" But the fact of the matter is that this might be even weirder.

For as long as I can remember, I have had a sense of constant panic deep inside me. My gut has been telling me for longer than I could speak that the man I loved was in danger. 

When I told Father Edric this, he said that it was nonsense. He said that I was too young to even  _have_ a lover, much less one in danger. So I waved it off, as anyone would do when their father-figure tells you such a thing at 3 years old. 

But recently, the feeling has been growing. I now feel the panic all the time. My ability to make bread has decreased because of my shaking hands. I don't understand. I don't understand any of these feelings. But I'm going to find out. 

And I'm going to save whoever god told me my lover was.


	2. Hopes Reignited

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is just getting more elaborate as I continue. But the ending is set in stone. I'm sorry. This is gonna hurt.

"Matthias?" a voice ripped me from my thoughts.

I looked up quickly. The baker, Oddr, stood beside me, a look of worry on his face.

"Yes?" I replied, shaking off my thoughts.

"Are you okay?" Oddr said.

"Yeah," I replied, "Why?"

"Because you're pounding that dough like bread, when its sourdough," Oddr said.

I looked down and saw the remains of the once-nice dough.

"Oh."

"Are you sure you're okay?" Oddr asked. "You've been lost in your head a lot recently."

"I've been stressed," I admitted.

"Do you need a break?" Oddr asked, worry in his eyes as he glanced over me.

"No," I said quickly. "Its not physical stress."

"Still," Oddr said. "I don't want my favorite worker to get sick."

"I won't," I said. "I'm fine, really. I just need to stop thinking about things."

"Seems to be a problem for a lot of people," Oddr said. "If you're sure you're okay-"

"I am."

"Alright," Oddr said, smiling, "then for the sake of bread I'm moving you to the counter."

"Okay," I said, wiping my hands on my apron. As I started to head to the front, Oddr grabbed my arm.

"Tomorrow," Oddr said. " I need all my workers in top shape for this establishment to run like the well-oiled machine it is today. Take the rest of the day off."

"I don't need to, really." I assured him. "I'm fine."

"Well, I'm not," Oddr said decidedly. "Go home."

"Fine," I said. "But I will be here before you open tomorrow."

"I look forward to it," he chuckled, then moved on to the front of the bakery.

I sighed. Seriously, I have _got_ to stop doing this. I need to keep working so I can feed myself. This isn't going to work.

I shrugged off my apron and hung it on the hook by the door. I quickly stepped out into the street, wind nearly sweeping me off my feet.

I walked briskly to the church, hoping that maybe God would help quell my fearful heart.

I opened the large wooden door, the creaking echoing throughout the cavernous building. I stepped onto the marble floor and quickly made my way to the second pew. I sat down, bowing my head as Father Edric had taught me all those years ago.

I started praying, but the words seemed to stick in my head. Pretty quickly I gave up on praying and began staring up at the painted ceiling. I sat there for a while, examining the naked children and trying to quell the feelings in my gut.

Suddenly, the wooden doors flew open. I whirled around to see two men, probably in their forties, rushing into the church. They practically ran past me towards the alter, only slowing their steps when Father Edric yelled at them. When they joined him at the alter they started whispering hurriedly.

I admit, I was curious. I stealthily crept up to one of the closer pews and listened in to their conversation.

"Boys," Father said, putting his palms out to signal calm, "I can't understand you. One at a time."

"Twenty years ago," the first started, "we did a very bad thing. At the time, we believed that we were doing right. But last night, we learned that we were wrong. We were horrifically wrong."

"What happened?" Father asked.

"We are witch hunters," the second said in a terrified whisper. "Last night, the leader of our small group was visited by the ghost of the witch we killed twenty years ago."

"A ghost you say?" The Father frowned. "Witches don't have ghosts."

"That's the thing," the first spoke up, his eyes shining in fear. "We think that we might have killed an... _innocent._ "

"You killed a man who did nothing?" I whispered. The two men whirled around, and I remembered that the church echoed.

I would have been embarrassed, but when I saw their eyes, something lit inside me. I felt... _rage_. I had never seen them before in my life, but they seemed to recognize me, too.

" _You!_ " they yelled together. The fear in their eyes had more than tripled. They looked like they had seen a ghost as well.

"Mathias," Father Edric was clearly as confused about what was happening as me, "do you know these men?"

"No, Father," I said through gritted teeth, trying to swallow the baseless feeling of anger flooding my chest. "I've never seen them in my life."

"You should be dead!" the first man said, no longer paying attention to the pastor behind him.

"Then it must be true," the second whispered. "The witch was just an ordinary man."

"I was born twenty years ago," I said. "What do I have to do with this witch?"

"We must tell Orion," the second said again. Almost immediately, the men ran out of the church, their pace swifter than the one they had entered upon.

"Who were they?" Father Edric asked, turning his steely eyes to me.

"I dunno," I said, flinching under the gaze. "I've never seen them before, like I said."

"They way you reacted, I doubt that," Father said.

"No, really!" I said, trying to defend myself. "It's just like that feeling about my lover! I don't know where it came from!"

Father paused for a moment, his gaze stuck in that one he always used when he was contemplating what to do with me.

"You have no idea?"

"None."

Father Edric sighed. "Alright, I might know someone who can help you with these phantom emotions."

That caught my attention. "Wait, really?"

"Yes," Father Edric sighed again. "But I will have to go talk to her. When you finished work tomorrow, I will take you over there."

"Thank you so much, Father!" I said excitedly, my eyes gleaming.

"Do not thank me," Father Edric said cooly. "This woman is nothing but trouble. She is a sinner who will never repent. I send you to her only because I can't have you be associated with witch hunters. Now begone."

"Oh...okay," I said, starting to backup to the door. "But, thank you."

I turned and ran to the door, escaping into the sunlight before anything Father Edric said could reach my ears.

I sat down on the steps, letting the sun brush my skin lightly. The men from before were gone. Only busy streets greeted me at the bottom of the steps.

I wondered who they were, and who they had killed. Or why they thought I should be dead.

Maybe they knew my father? Maybe I looked so much like he did they thought I was him. But what would mean that they had killed my dad. Maybe he had been the witch they had killed twenty years ago.

I shook my head. If my dad had been a witch, then I would be able to do magic, too. And it still didn't explain what happened to my mother or why I live in that basement beneath the church.

I should just stop thinking about it. After all I have nothing more than what I did the last fifty times I was on this same train of thought. I would just have to wait for tomorrow.

I stood, yawning. I hadn't gotten much sleep last night. Maybe a nap was in order. I headed down the stairs, then turned to go behind the church.

Yeah. A nap sounded nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why this is still going.


End file.
